Horny For The Gym
Discover more from Life With Bianca
substack #20
In case you’re new here or a reminder could help, this newsletter began as an exploration of figuring shit out, one day at a time. If you look forward to these newsletters consider supporting me by upgrading to a paid subscription.
Happy Pride to all my girls, gays, and theys. To kick off Pride Month let’s talk about some gay shit. And as my gift to you, a little playlist to help you queers get horny for/at the gym.
Things helping me figure shit out:
💦 I’ve never really been into Pride as a thing. But, I’ve been talking to a lot of femmes in my life who are questioning if they are in fact straight. (Sorry loves, hate to break it to you but I actually don’t know if anyone is truly a heterosexual.) So let’s talk about “coming out.”
💦 A few years ago I came across the idea of “inviting in” rather than “coming out.” I’ve never understood the idea of “coming out.” Above all it always seemed like a very American thing that ignores a lot of variants in racial, cultural, and socioeconomic privilege. QT/BIPOC folks are so often made to choose between our self and our safety. The use of the phrase “inviting in” turns the table on coming out, and focuses on our personal agency to invite those we desire to enter our life.
💦 It’s hard to trace where the phrase originates. But with the fuckery that’s resurfaced with the recent Anti-LGBT Statement released by homophobic Islamic scholars, it feels great to be able to note Lebanese, Muslim, scholar Sekneh Hammoud-Becket’s work “Azima ila Hayati–An invitation in to my life: Narrative Conversations about Sexual Identity.” Her work offers one of the alternatives to the “coming out” paradigm, or what she and her brother named “coming in.”
💦 Honestly, I never came out and you don’t have to either if you don’t want to. Whatever you decide, it’s most important that you just do you, boo. To know you is a privilege and a gift you for you to offer to people you trust.
Baddie Bookclub
I’m in the middle of prepping my spring class and flirting with the layout of a book I think I need to write. Right now, I’m pulling on threads around speculative archives, who we deem futurists, and what it means to live a life beyond survivorship. If those things feel exciting to you too check out Wayward Lives, Beautiful Experiments: Intimate Histories of Riotous Black Girls, Troublesome Women, and Queer Radicals. Saidiya Hartman blends history and fiction to chronicle the sexual and gender rebellions of young Black women.
Quick Links
🏳️⚧️ Check out one of the largest reports on Transmasculine Health
🌈 Support Black, trans, & queer-led abolitionist organizing
🇱🇧 The first LGBTQIA+ rights organization in the Arab world
🎥 THIS WEEK - Paris Is Burning @ Long Beach QFC
🟪 This Purple / Red Scale badly needs a redesign, but it was one of the first things on the internet that helped me name my need for a more expansive language on sexuality, attraction, and desire - as a visual learner I often share it as a visual way to begin unpacking aspects of our sexuality
Horny For The Gym
💦💦💦💦
💦💦💦💦